“Wait, are you serious?”, my husband responded to my sharing the news that the UK just appointed a Minister of Loneliness. When it comes to the subject of loneliness, many are indeed serious, as the “looming loneliness crisis” is cutting a wide swath, regardless of age or income. As a public, we should be concerned about social connection, given that we are living in the most technologically connected age in history, and yet rates of loneliness have doubled since the 1980’s. Why is this?
Evidence points to our cities designed for cars, and buildings designed for elevators as part of the problem. The other major source of loneliness can be found in our online activities. Simply having our phone nearby can hurt our close relationships; research reveals excessive and unhealthy Internet use can increase feelings of loneliness over time; and, adding to the isolation, society tends to ostracize the lonely, perhaps intuitively knowing that loneliness is contagious. This social dilemma has wide and deep health implications as well, with loneliness being compared to the health risks associated with obesity or smoking 15 cigarettes/day.
So what do we do?
We could learn from Beau Han Bridge’s story. At the age of 24, he’s found that technology and social media can lead to a deeper sense of social isolation, so he started a theatre company to do creative projects that involve more face-to-face interaction between young people. (They just finished a successful run of their second production.)
Then there’s the Vancouver Foundation Neighborhood Small Grants designed to combat their organization’s survey findings that unexpectedly revealed loneliness and isolation as top community concerns. Grant recipients have used funds for a community patio building effort, a backyard “All About Bees” event, and a street-party fiddle concert. The relationships forged and deepened through these community gatherings are an important part of a loneliness antidote.
At first glance, the “loneliness epidemic” appears to run counter to Clay Shirky’s theory of cognitive surplus, based on the capacity for technology to turn consumers into collaborators for good in the world. Shirky advocates productive engagement with technology for positive communal, public and civic benefits, including small creative acts (LOLcats) to larger ones, such as the remarkable example of Ushahidi. In the context of loneliness, however, I question if the dopamine-rush offered by “LOLcats” is feeding online tendencies that are counter-productive. Still, could cognitive surplus play a role in solving the crisis of loneliness?
Perhaps part of the answer is found in Stuart Dakers recent article in The Guardian, where he shares loneliness is about more than not having enough friends:
“It is about belonging, and belonging is about taking part, and taking part is about being of use, of being engaged. Loneliness is not about being useless but being unused. It is about being unknown, disappointed, deprived of something to look forward to.”
For most of us, however, the biggest part of the answer for a less lonely world might be as simple as putting down our phones. Even if we’re not lonely, perhaps the people near us are.
‘Til next week,
DLM
P.S. Check out this week’s musical reflection, chosen because we all just want to matter.